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17 and I love to explore everything. Being young always tho Im getting older, that's so me. I love Beyonce and i'm crazy about her. Quotes, girls, singing - my obsessions. Tho i'm rebellious, i still have my own goals. I dream alot. &in reality, i never give up to catch my dreams. This is the blog which i'm going to jot down my feelings and thoughts. Love, me.   Music Playlist at MixPod.com |
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There's no love in me , not anymore .
Monday, July 13, 2009 @ 5:11 AM
 I am wondering , why teens life is getting tougher and tougher each day . I know i must be opstimitic when problems take place in life. It really takes courage for me to face those problems and also to move on apparently . Nevertheless , it's life . Afterall, life is not only about a bed of roses kan ? Maybe i shall treat this as one lesson whereby friends just come and go . And once again , i shall again let karma take over the situation.Everyday in school , i laugh like crazy , like my own house . But trust me , there's always tears and problems occur behind those laughter and smiles . I mean , everyone . No one lives with anti-problems . Even clowns have problems . Hyperactive and cheerful people , will have problems . Take Anzahari Taib as an example . I am honoured and proud to have a cousin like him . We laughed alot , yes we are . 15 years of living with him around , he never shed tears or get angry with me , never . He believes that , getting angry or cry for that problems , will never settle that problems . Although we share good times together , we always share our bad times together . See , everyone has problems no matter how luxury they are , how happy they are . & i am really envy of him , seriously . I just want to be strong like him . I cried whenever problems occur . I will be emo whenever problems occur . I will lose self-esteem whenever problems occur . But after i think back , if i were to compare my problems with my parents problems , theirs are far more tougher to handle . Just minutes ago , my parents just fought over some issue and one of them is about financial . But i just don't get my mother where she still bought me good food when she knew that she really needs the money for water and electricity bills and not to forget , my mom's monthly medical bills . I knew my parents are having some problem yet to be settled on money case . Hence , i never speak up on her about any money needed for school . I paid for myself for almost everything that i can afford . I save every leftover pocket money and pay for school stuff , TYS chemistry book , art materials and whatever shits . I have ordered class photos and i guess i have to sacrifice not to have any of those . Maybe , it's a sadden thing for me . But it's a good choice for parents . Youknow i always collect things for good memory lahh kann , like every year , i ordered class photos . Suddenly this year , i did not order anything . ! bet that im the only one who will not order any . =.= I really can't listen to the quarrel and blames on each other within them. Thus i walked off my house to my favourite peaceful corridor , the place where i always emokia at and stared at the dark sky and whispered to myself , trying to ask some help from god . 0.o I began to lose interest in studying because i day dream , most of the time while i suppose to be listening in class , and sometimes i left behind , tasks were not given on time . I guess studying is such a great burden to my parents . I don't mind quitting school and work for them if that's choice given which i know it's impossible . ** If it sounds abit sympathetic to you . Just click the red 'x' button and close this fucking window . I am just expressing my feelings . zzz, I really have no mood now . I have been listening to soul songs nowadays . & get well soon kyle bestie x3 
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